Homemade Yogurt, Protein Bars, and Fish Erotica

It takes some creativity, ingenuity, and a little extra work to be able to live an organic, chemical free life on a budget.

Saturday is the day of the week set aside in our household, not only to do our housekeeping and laundry, but to make the things others might buy. My motto is "If I can make it, I don't buy it." You would be amazed at what one can make and accomplish if you try.

In addition to the household cleaners, laundry detergent, and dog treats covered in previous blogs,  I make homemade yogurt and protein bars. As much as we look for these items at salvage grocery stores (which will be a blog for next week), we still save lots of money making them ourselves.

So today, in between loads of laundry, I began the task of making both.

I was very happy, by the way,  as a dreary, wet day, filled with sunshine and I was able to hang the blankets outside to dry. Inside, I hung my work and workout gear above a heating vent and they dried quickly.  Never let a good heating vent go to waste.

Jamie, in the meantime, washed all the dishes, folded the towels and the family cloth, and cleaned the bathroom with her new favorite cleaner....baking soda and Dr Bronner's paste. She then got into a very strange conversation on Facebook regarding erotic fish poetry after our local grocery advertised Tilapia Loins. Since when do fish have loins? Her contribution to the discussion was in the spirit of the Song of Solomon and is as follows:

"How beautiful are the fins of my lover, her scales brilliant as jewels, her loins girded with fishly desire". 

Anyhoo, back to the yogurt.....

If you are unaware, organic yogurt is not cheap. For a 32 oz of Nancy's Organic Probiotic Yogurt, I pay about $6. Instead of simply eating that $6 yogurt, using it as a yogurt culture to make more yogurt, is an efficient way to stretch a dollar. In fact, depending on how much yogurt you eat, you can save up to $1000 dollars a year according to some estimates. 

What you will need:

1/2 pint Ball canning jars with lids and caps
Whole or 2 percent organic milk
 Large stainless steel stock pot
Canning funnel
Yogurt starter (store bought or some from your last batch of homemade yogurt)
Measuring spoons
Dishpan
Oven with oven light
Bathtowel
Thermometer optional but not necessary

1. HEAT: Pour milk into your stockpot. You can use any amount but it must be greater than one quart. Homemade yogurt will last 2-3 weeks in your refrigerator, so keep that in mind when selecting the amount of milk you will use. Heat the milk on low to medium heat until bubbles come to the top forming a skin or 180 degrees. Turn the heat off. 
2. STERILIZE: Pour the hot milk straight into your jars. I use 1/2 pint jars. Allow 1 inch head space. The hot milk will sterilize your jars. 
3. COOL: Let your milk until you can pour your finger into it. Warm but not burn, at about 115 degrees if using a thermometer. 
4. STARTER: Add your yogurt starter. I add 1 tsp per 1/2 pint. Stir the starter gently into the milk. You are introducing, not incorporating the starter. 
5. INCUBATE: Cap your jars, tight, but not too tight. Place your jars gently into a dishpan, fill the pan with the hottest water you can get from your tap, up to the milk level of your jars. This will help incubate your yogurt. Place the dishpan on the lowest rack in your oven, with the oven light on,  and cover the dishpan with a bath towel. Incubate overnight. In the morning, transfer your yogurt to the fridge to cool. 

Homemade yogurt will have a layer of whey on the top which is wonderfully abundant with healthy yogurt cultures. I incorporate this whey into my smoothies or stir it back into the yogurt.  In order to make Greek yogurt, line a bowl with several layers of cheesecloth held in place with rubber bands. Place your incubated yogurt on top of the cheesecloth, and allow the whey to drain through for several hours in your refrigerator. The longer you allow the yogurt to drain, the thicker your Greek yogurt will be. In the bottom of the bowl will be delicious whey that can be incorporated into other recipes. On the top will be your Greek yogurt.  Be advised that the yield will be one half or less than the yield of making the plain yogurt. You can add fruit, nuts, granola, oats, flax, chia seeds, honey, vanilla etc to your yogurt. 

You can do a 1/2 gallon of organic yogurt, for $3 or less.

Now to the Protein Bars....

What you will need:

2 cups creamy peanut butter
1 1/4 cups of honey
2 cups (not scoops) of protein powder
1 cup of oats
1/4 cup of chia seeds (flax seeds can be substituted as desired)

Heat your peanut butter and honey in the microwave for 90 seconds and stir. Add the protein powder. We prefer vanilla protein powder. I make these in my KitchenAid stand mixer with paddle attachment. Mix thoroughly and add oats and seeds mixing as you go. Spread the mixture in a pan and refrigerate. Makes about 24 bars. The bars are very nutrient dense. A little bit goes a long way. 

Considering that store bought protein bars are $1-3 each, the saving is amazing utilizing this recipe.

So there you have it, TONS of savings with just a little time and effort. Speaking of time and effort, the bidet experiment has gone wonderfully this week. We are squeaky clean, and no trees were harmed in the wiping of our booties. We realized the family cloth pieces used to pat us dry could be smaller which saved on laundry cost. We also found the cold water an effective way to wake our asses up at 3 am when I get ready for work. We only had two visitors this week (Jamie's parents), who were intrigued by the bidet but were afraid to try it. They quickly realized that blocking cold bidet water with your behind was more favorable than your face. So we declare this experiment a success!!

Winter Clotheslines and Swooning over a Skill Saw

Finally! A day warm enough to put up the clothesline! And yes, it is January!! We're nuts like that.














Since we live in an old farm house, the old rusted metal poles are still standing. Unfortunately, the holes to hang the line wasn't wide enough for hardware, so we improvised.

We pulled the line tight using the brute strength only given to true lesbians by the goddess Artemus (yeah, made that up). No really, we used a series of leverages, ending with an unused electrical pole.

Next Jamie cut about a foot off of a couple of 2X4's, then cut a notch in one end for the line with a skill saw for the line to run through. We almost had to stop right then. (Swoon )

Once both I and the line was stabilized, our clothes lifted off the ground.

I know what you are thinking. "What the hell are you doing hanging clothes out in the middle of winter?" Well first, watch your language. Second, we're doing it to save energy. We do a lot of laundry. Between the dogs' blankets, our gym and work clothes, and our family cloths (more on that in the previous blog  To Bidet or not to Bidet: That is the Question), our laundry days are booked solid.

Since we save money making our own detergent and fabric softener, and the poles were already available, we just couldn't wait. So now, on sunny winter days, I hang out the clothes. Sun, by the way is a natural bleach which is awesome for our family cloths. Adding some salt to the rinse cycle keeps the clothes from freezing in the cold weather.

Mother Earth News offers the following 100 year old clothes drying tips:

• Do not let clothes freeze as it damages the fibers and fades colors.
• Add salt to rinse water to help keep clothes from freezing.
• Hang whites in the sun and colored articles in the shade.
• Make an apron with a large, baglike pocket to hold clothespins for convenience while working.
• To keep hands warm in freezing weather, boil the clothespin bag and dry the pins by the fire before heading outdoors.
• Every few weeks, immerse the clothespin bag in boiling water for 3-5 minutes. Spread out the pins to dry quickly by the fire or in the sun. This keeps them from becoming brittle and cracking.
• Dip the heads of part of the clothespins in dark paint, some in light paint and leave the rest unpainted. Use the dark ones for colored clothes, the white for miscellaneous towels and the unpainted for sheer whites.
• Hang tablecloths, sheets and blankets by the corners, not draped from the middle, to keep them from being damaged in the wind.
• When taking down clothes, put the clothes basket in a wagon to move along with you. Shake the wrinkles from each article, fold and lay them orderly in the basket rather than a disorderly

Read more: http://www.motherearthnews.com/homesteading-and-livestock/100-year-old-hints-for-drying-clothes.aspx#ixzz3PVjhxbJb

One modern day tip we would like to add. Non American made clothespins are crap. They fall apart the first use. For good quality American made clothespins, Vermont Clothespins are the way to go. The link to their site is http://vermontclothespins.com/

To Bidet, or not to Bidet? That is the question.

When I heard about the number of trees that had been killed in my lifetime to wipe my own booty, I thought I would cry. Quickly however,  I realized that I would need some toilet paper to blow my nose, and needed to reconsider.

Americans use 36.5 billion rolls of toilet paper every year, representing the pulping of some 15 million trees. “This also involves 473,587,500,000 gallons of water to produce the paper and 253,000 tons of chlorine for bleaching. That manufacturing requires about 17.3 terawatts of electricity annually."


To make it personal, that means the process of making a single roll of toilet paper requires 37 gallons of water, 1.3 kilowatt/hours (KWh) of electricity and some 1.5 pounds of wood. ONE ROLL OF TOILET PAPER!!!!! http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/earth-talks-bidets/

Since Jamie and I are attempting to live an ethical life with more of a positive impact on the lives of others than a negative one on the earth, I knew we had to find an alternative. Then I remembered my younger years traipsing across Europe. In Europe, Japan, and parts of South America, bidet's sit beside toilets.

 Not to be mistaken for interesting water fountains, water features, or children's play area, bidets are intended to sit on while a small squirt of water cleans your privates after you potty.

Frowned upon or laughed at, bidets don't seem to tickle the fancy or dirty privates of most North Americans.

Thankfully, however, the tide is turning as more Americans realize the impact on the environment and on their wallets. What was once considered one of those weird things European's do, is now becoming a great idea, and its affordable too!

When we decided to take the plunge to see if we could afford it on our small budget, we went to Amazon.com. What we found was a bidet attachment for only $36.27 with FREE shipping.

The Luxe Bidet MB110 Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment was just what the European doctor ordered! To order your own, click HERE. 

We ordered it and Jamie installed it. Unfortunately she decided to test it while sitting directly in front of the spray, but afterwards, we had solid evidence that it was doing what it was intended to do. 

Being the brave and experienced world traveler I am, I gave it a go first and immediately had a pleasant reminder of my days in Europe when I was just plain pooped after a day of sightseeing. 

Now incredibly fresh and thrilled, but not willing to just air dry, I used our next addition to this potty party.....the family cloth. In lieu (or loo?) of toilet paper, we had ordered 100 percent organic cotton on Ebay for $12 a yard. I then cut it into generous and cozy strips. After using the bidet, the family cloth is only necessary to pat oneself dry. 

Jamie and I have been debating if a cloth can be reused by the same individual after an innocent tinkle and sprinkle before it goes into the wash.   We still have not come to a determination. In the meantime, once used, the cloth goes into a bucket filled with a water and vinegar to be washed at a later time. Hopefully when we hang them on the clothesline to dry, the neighbors will not abscond with our 100 percent organic booty. 

I shared our wonderful news with our daughter, and once we picked her up off the floor after an unfortunate fainting spell, we promised to keep a roll or two of toilet paper in the house just for her. 

Green, Mean, and Hippy Clean

In her research for the second edition of her book, Secrets of a Vet Tech (coming out soon), Jamie found significant evidence that chemicals in our environment, including in our cleaning products, fertilizers, weed killers, and cigarette smoke, have a major impact on our pets.

In a 2008 study by the Environmental Working Group, dogs and cats were tested for industrial chemicals. The results showed  that 48 out of the 70 industrial chemicals they tested for were present in those pets. 

We have to keep in mind that our pets can be exposed to environmental toxins even more than we can. When we walk, most of the time, we wear shoes. This gives us a barrier from the chemicals we have cleaned our floors with or the pesticides we use in our garden. Our pets on the other hand, walk on unprotected paws. Our children crawl on the floors, bare feet and bare handed. What it is doing to them? In addition to the respiratory, skin, eye irritation, and other unknown effects, we do know that  every year more than a million children under the age of 5 swallow poisons like household cleaners.

 So being parents to an adult daughter and pet parents to a large group of animals, we had to ask ourselves what we could do to create the healthiest home environment for our family.

We believe our homes to be "clean", when they have a scent such as pine, citrus, lemon, Lysol, or some other "chemical" scent. We spend hundreds of dollars per year, purchasing cleaning products and air fresheners to make sure our homes have a "clean scent," when in reality, a true clean has no scent. Clean smells clean. Chemicals smell like chemicals....toxic!
 

  

So, all the old cleaners are out! How do we begin? With simple homemade cleaners with all natural ingredients. 

We have already been making our own laundry detergent, so this week I began making an all natural home made bleach alternative for clothes, and white vinegar serving as a very wonderful fabric softener. My next project is to felt wool dryer balls to decrease the static in my clothes dryer and Jamie and I will be constructing clothes lines for drying our clothes outdoors.

The cleaner that surprised Jamie and I the most in its effectiveness has been baking soda mixed with a small amount of Dr. Bronner's Soap. For those unfamiliar with Dr. Bronner's Magic "All-1!" soap, it is a certified, organic, fair-trade saponified castile liquid soap with more uses than you can shake a stick at. Dr. Bronners can be used as an all purpose cleaner, fruit and vegetable rinse, soft scrub for cleaning bathtubs, tiles, and toilets, window cleaner,  hand soap in a foamer bottle, dog shampoo, human shampoo, laundry detergent, dish detergent, shaving cream, bath soap, baby wash, body wash, mopping solution, and the list goes on. It comes in various scents such as peppermint, almond, tea tree, lavender, eucalyptus, and unscented for baby. For a link to some of the great uses for Dr. Bronner's see this link: 14 uses for Dr Bronners Soap

Dr. Bronner's Castile Soaps are available online, at most natural foods markets, Kroger's, Target, and our local Mac's Medicine Mart in Kingsport. For more information on the soap please see their website:  https://www.drbronner.com/

The following are our recipes. 

Laundry Detergent:

2 Bars Fels Naptha Soap
1 Box Arm & Hammer Washing Soda
20 Mule Team Borax

Using a cheese grater, grate your soap bars. Combine all dry ingredients and mix well. Store in a re-purposed gallon container.  Use 1/2 to 1 cup per load. For a fabric softener add 1/2 cup white vinegar at the rinse cycle.

Natural Bleach Alternative/All Purpose Cleaner:

3 quarts spring water
1/4 cup fresh squeezed lemon juice
1 cup 3 % hydrogen peroxide

Pour ingredients into a repurposed gallon size jug. This is also good for tubs, toilets, and sinks or add to a spray bottle and use as a window cleaner. It kills 99.9 percent of bacteria making it an excellent disinfectant. You can also pour the mixture and baking soda into the toilet and let it sit for 10 minutes before using your toilet brush to clean.

Dr. Bronner's Soft Scrub:

Mix a small amount of baking soda with Dr Bronner's soap to make a paste. Depending on the size of the job you are doing, the amounts will vary. You may add a small amount of water to the mixture. Use a stiff brush or scouring pad if necessary. This removed stains in our tub and refrigerator that we could not remove with undiluted bleach.

 

The following is the link for the Dr. Bronner's Dilutions Cheat Sheet : Dilution Cheat Sheet for Dr. Bronners

 

See all the cool crap you can do when you don't waste your time watching tv?

 

Orpington Dreams and Warm Buddhas

Well, we sold the television and cancelled Netflix. Woot!

Within 5 minutes of our last blog posting, the idiot box was sold for $70. We've now saved $120 toward our new hen house we've planned for the spring.

With our weight training, it takes A LOT of protein to keep us going and in a home that is vegetarian, that means cage free eggs. LOTS of cage free eggs. And the freaking things are expensive but better than cramming beakless birds into a cage the size of a microwave. Speaking of microwaves, I hate them. I don't like irradiating my food. However, Jamie has one that is permanently installed, so I give it dirty looks. I must admit, (with shame) to using it a time or two. I had to admit it, because Jamie had photographic evidence.

Anyway, back to the hens...Our research has shown that the best birds for us are orpingtons. They are small and friendly, lay eggs large for their size, and are consistent layers. Being small, the cost of feed is affordable. But we're only buying females. No cocks for this household! :) Now to find a supplier.

Orpington Cockerel

The freezing weather surprised us recently. The farm house can be cold. Thanks to a tip from daughter Amber, we lined our outer bedroom wall with quilts Jamie had made. It was a significant help. We've been able to keep the electric bill low this winter by keeping the thermostat at 65 degrees, using 13 watt energy efficient bulbs to replace our 60 watt bulbs. They are brighter, even. Cuddling and puppy piles have also been very effective in helping us to stay warm. 

I needed a hat to keep me warm on the way to work, so I crocheted an awesome beret one evening while Jamie wrote and we listened to celtic music. Now I'm working on a scarf. Buddha thinks the hat rocks.

 I made an interesting meal for Sunday dinner. Apple empanada and carrot and potato hash browns. While one would expect apples in an apple empanada, one would not expect peppers, onions,  tomatoes and apples with a home made pie crust. Surprise!! Served over an imported brown rice from our local Chinese market, it was a hit. I know because Jamie didn't sneak her plate under the table to the dogs. She even went back for seconds...especially the hash browns.

So I'm off to finish my scarf. Buddha might get chilly tonight.

Hippies on the Edge

Haseleah and Jamie...two dreamers, poets, and hippies in love living at Whisper Creek Farmhouse with 12 rescue dogs, 7 cats, and 1 mouse. At the foothills of the Appalachian Mountains, standing deep in musical bluegrass, we make our home in our own unique way.

A rainbow flag waves in the breeze, hippy stickers on our cars, barking dogs, sleeping cats, and Maple, the mouse overlooking it all.

Being dreamers, we like to think that we can help make the world a better place, even if its our own tiny part of the world.

Although we were both born and bred southerners and take pride in our Scot-Irish ancestry, we don't always blend in. We're hippies on the edge. :)

Lesbians in love, nag champa incense burning, Calypso, Bob Dylan, and The Smiths playing on the boombox (and yes I did say boombox). I am making organic dog biscuits, while Jamie makes home made laundry detergent.

Our choice to live uniquely brings a questioning glance when we admit, we watch no television. We have ended 2014, and decided to begin 2015 in the same manner....television free. For our family this means NO TELEVISION, NO CABLE, OR LOCAL TELEVISION CHANNELS.

Our first conundrum has been whether to sell a 32 inch flat screen television and accompanying DVD player that we no longer use. After little consideration, the decision was made to sell both the television and DVD player and use the proceeds to go toward our new hen house. Off to the auction goes the idiot box and in comes organic, cruelty-free eggs.

In the time we have been together, we have had more meaningful conversations, shared more stories, laughed louder and harder, and danced to more music, than we ever thought possible. We don't take our time together for granted. We get jiggy with it.

We understand the reluctance to make the choice we have made, but breaking the hold of addictive electronic media frees you from so much. The endless drone of commercialization, constant depressing news feed, mindless propaganda and entertainment can make us zombies.

Once you wake up to a world without the television always in the background, you realize that you missed a whole hell of a lot. Your kids have grown, your partner aged, and your dog now has gray hair. But its never to late to make new memories where you are present in the moment and not lost in  TV Land.

So while you may never meditate with us or make your own bathtub cleaner, follow us as we practice the old ways, and maybe discover something new to help us live this life we've chosen.....Hippies on the Edge.